Thursday, April 9, 2009

The Real Meaning of Real Estate, by Hans of Hans und Klaus

"Character Space" - This one is often seen in historic buildings or houses. The name brings up imagery of a colourful "arty" sophisticated, classic chic living or working space. In reality, Character Space is a euphemism for "Shithole." Some concepts I associate with Character Space are:
-Old World Class: no hot water or insulation
-Natural Indoor-Outdoor Flow: Leaky walls and ceiling - prepare your buckets
-Refurbished: the mold and mildew, cracks in walls, and spiders' webs were painted over
-Homely: not designed for a population of normal sized humans. More designed for a population of pygmies; possibly morlocks.

Count on it, whatever can go wrong in a property there's a euphemism to sell it. To make you want it that way. And such euphemism-swathed properties are never hard to find. So what do you do? You, poor, beguiled consumer, fall for a homely refurbished Art Deco character space with old world class, natural indoor-outdoor flow that's a real fixer-upper. Yes, that's real customer power right there.

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