Book Reviews, Part 2

Role Models by John Waters

My god, this man has had a fascinating life. I know that that should go without saying but this book really shows it, purely by describing the lives of people Waters (Waters? No. You know what, from now on I'm going to call him John), has known. I love the way John writes; you actually feel like you're sitting down with a friend catching up over coffee. Which, I suppose, is exactly what John did with each of his role models in preparation for this book, but he makes you feel like you're sitting down with them too.

Role Models is John's latest publication, and, as the title would have you (hopefully), assume, it is about his role models. The people who helped John, or at least influenced him, to get to where he is today. And my, they are an amazing bunch. From Leslie van Houten to an estate-pocketing barmaid in Baltimore, to Johnny Mathis and my beloved Tennessee Williams, Mr. Waters has known the best of the best. And if you're anything like me, these are the people you WANT to know. They're fucking crazy geniuses. Fuck being normal when you can be a crazy genius. Fuck "fitting in" when you could hang out with the freaks.

I literally could not put this book down. The only time I ever did was to feed my cat. I read the entire book on the last day I had off work (last Tuesday). I was sad when I finished it because I wanted to read more about these fascinating freaks, and of course, about John himself.

My favourite chapters (it's so hard to choose!), were the ones about Leslie van Houten (former Manson Family member and Milhouse van Houten's namesake), Zorro the lesbian stripper, Tennessee Williams, and Rick James. The only chapter I wasn't that keen on was the one about John's favourite fashion designer. But I guess that's because I don't really give two shits about clothes.

Next on my reading list is Crackpot: The Obsessions of John Waters, which I picked up from work at a tidy price. I can't wait to have some free time to read it.

So, in short (mainly because it's 2am and I really should try to sleep), John Waters is amaaaaazing and I love that he's done the people who inspired him justice by writing this fantastic book. He rules. 5/5.

Last few books I read, part one

The Marriage Plot by Jeffrey Eugenides

It wasn't Middlesex, but why would I want anyone, even Eugenides, to top one of my top three favourite books?

What I got out of The Marriage Plot was completely different to what I got out of Middlesex. And I mean that in the best possible way. Eugenides just writes characters that feel so real - sometimes they're actually quite unlikable, but that's what makes them actually well-rounded. For example, I hate it when I read an autobiography and even though it's a "true story", the author puts on this obviously fake voice to make themselves seem so likable. Which in turn actually makes them sound like some fake frothy caricature of themselves.

Anyway, my point is that sometimes characters in novels, especially Eugenides's novels, seem more real than "real" people. His characters develop but they stay true to themselves. I related to all three main characters for different reasons. I felt that perhaps the portrayal of Leonard as a manic depressive was perhaps a little unsympathetic, and this is coming from someone who grew up around two of them (aka my parents). I think Eugenides might have missed the point of his own character, perhaps - to me, Leonard was someone who found everyday life extraordinarily hard to deal with, but he tried his hardest to hold it together. But what I actually found to be the overarching point Eugenides was trying to make is that Leonard is selfish, hard to deal with and not good enough for Madeleine. The thing about manic depression, however, is that you have to want to hold it together for yourself before you can be good enough for anyone else. And it's not selfish. It's not selfish at all. How can having zero percent self-worth be selfish?

I don't know. I guess I worry that ignorant people will read Leonard's character and think, "Wow, there's no hope for people with bipolar disorder. I sure as fuck won't ever date one of them."

But that's life, I guess.

Eugenides writes life. I don't know how he does it. But I read a book of his and I feel like he's written my life down and put everything into context for me. The only other author I've felt that with has been Margaret Atwood, and really truly only in Cat's Eye.

So anyway - I'm trying not to give away anything about the plot here, just let you know that it really is an incredibly well-written book and that's why you should read it. Good writing makes the plot irrelevant. The way you think a story is going to go is not why you read.

4/5. Loses a point because the cover doesn't do the book justice.

Best Albums of 2011

Honourable mentions to:

Feist - Metals
PJ Harvey - Let England Shake
Bill Callahan - Apocalypse
Wild Flag - Self-titled
Battles - Gloss Drop

Some things I have been enjoying lately.

2011 continues to be awesome

Best comic ever?

All the shit I liked today.

http://youtu.be/aUfu-lEflbQ

http://thekittencovers.tumblr.com/

“Of course my jokes are in poor taste, inappropriate, and confused; they reveal my lack of security. But that is because I have no respect for myself.”

― Fyodor Dostoevsky, Notes from Underground

"Are you familiar with the work of Dr. Peter Mark Roget? He understood that to dump sewage into the river you drink from is to no one's advantage. He would be very happy if you opened up his thesaurus and quit saying 'fuck.'"

- From Cruddy by Lynda Barry

I think I will make this at the flatwarming.

Just to see if I survive.

Classic Champagne Punch

Ingredients
1 1/3 cups of Fresh Lemon Juice
1 cup of Vodka
1/2 cup of Orange Liqueur
1/2 cup of Triple Sec1/2 cup of Cognac
1/2 cup of Fresh Orange Juice
2 bottles of Champagne

Mixing Instructions
Combine the lemon juice, sugar, orange liqueur, Triple Sec, cognac, and orange juice in a non-reactive bowl and stir until the sugar is completely dissolved. Add the Champagne and stir to combine. Cover and refrigerate until chilled, about 1 hour. Pour into a decorative bowl or pitcher. Garnish with orange or lemon slices and fresh strawberries, if desired. Serve in Champagne flutes, wine glasses, or punch cups.

How to decode someone with an anxiety disorder.

lipstickandsidewalk

Things we can’t help but do all the time:

1. second-guess ourselves
2. behave impulsively and reactively
3. worry
4. have difficulty accepting compliments
5. have difficulty reciprocating friendly gestures
6. have difficulty finding the courage to respond
7. have difficulty not being suspicious of others’ intentions

things you should keep in mind:

1. we’re scared of everything
2. pretty much all of the time
3. it’s an actual disorder
4. it manifests as impulsive behavior
5. you can’t fix us with words
6. also, we wear a lot of armor
7. cold, heavy, affection-proof armor with spikes
8. we constructed this armor as children
9. we’re fairly certain you will never be able to pry it apart
10. but there is a nice person under there, we promise

things you can do for a friend with an anxiety disorder:

1. stick around
2. ask them if they’re comfortable in a place or situation
3. be willing to change the place or situation if not
4. activities that help them take their mind off of things are good!
5. talk to them even when they might not talk back
6. try not to take their reactions (or lack thereof) personally
7. give them time to respond to you
8. they will obsess over how they are being interpreted
9. they will anticipate being judged

things you shouldn’t do:

1. tell us not to worry
2. tell us we’ll be fine
3. mistake praise for comfort
4. ask us if we are “getting help”
5. force us to be social
6. force us to do things that trigger us
7. “face your fears” doesn’t always work
8. it would be more accurate to say we are scared of the fear itself

emergency action procedure for panic attacks:

1. be calm
2. be patient
3. don’t be condescending
4. remind us that we’re not “crazy”
5. sit with us
6. ask us to tighten and relax our muscles one by one
7. remind us that we are breathing
8. engage us in a discussion (if we can talk, then we can breathe)
9. if we are having trouble breathing, try getting us to exhale slowly
10. or breathe through our nose
11. or have us put our hands on our stomach to feel each breath
12. ask us what needs to change in our environment in order for us to feel safe
13. help us change it
14. usually, just knowing that we have someone on our side is enough to calm us down.

Luckily I haven't had a panic attack in years. But this whole thing is pretty accurate.

'"Remember that day you said you loved me? Remember that? See, you could do that because you're basically a sane person, who grew up in a loving, sane family. You could take a risk like that. But in my family we didn't go around saying we loved each other. We went around screaming at each other. So what do I do, when you say you love me? I go and undermine it."

Had she known from the outset about his manic depression, his messed-up family, his shrink habit, Madeleine would never have allowed herself to get so passionately involved. But now that she was passionately involved, she found little to regret.

To feel so much was its own justification."

- From The Marriage Plot by Jeffrey Eugenides.

I love this book. Love it. I always identify so strongly with Eugenides's characters. I want to write like he does.

"In Madeleine's face was a stupidity Mitchell had never seen before. It was the stupidity of all normal people. It was the stupidity of the fortunate and beautiful, of everybody who got what they wanted in life and so became unremarkable."

- from The Marriage Plot by Jeffrey Eugenides